“Honey, I lost my…..”

If your spouse reports to you the loss of a wallet, credit card, or purse, what should be your first reaction?

Please don’t scold. Your spouse feels bad enough already. Be kind, thoughtful, and helpful. No one is going to lose something valuable on purpose, so why should you make him or her feel worse by your criticism?

This advice is important, I promise you. So, does this also apply for a child who spills his drink, or drops something because he or she is still clumsy? Are you going to get irritated? Or are you going to make your child feel that it is not a big deal and he or she simply needs to clean up? And, please be kind and help clean the mess.

Life is full of these little scenarios and depending on how we react to them, we will deepen our relationship with someone else or distance ourselves from that person. We have an opportunity to initiate a trust relationship with a child and help this boy or girl be proud and respectful of themselves. If not, we risk making a child feel that they are worthless.

We may not always realize it but we do have the power.

Living for the sake of others takes many forms

Today I want to relate the story of two nurses who work at the chemotherapy/infusion center near the Community Hospital of my town. Their names, it took me six chemo sessions to finally remember their names.
They don’t look alike; they are not twins by any means. However, as nurses of a very specialized medical center - they are alike.

As patients we know very little about them. Why? Because once they step into the Chemo Center (as I call it) at 7:00am in the morning, they have left their personal lives at home. The only thing they think about is every patient they will interact with that day. Their temperament brings joy, hope and a sense of calmness.

They are attentive to the needs of everyone. It is just as if I and I alone, was there that day. You do not have a sense that something in their minds or hearts may be troubling them, because their personal lives are just not showing. They are fully and completely engrossed in the well-being of their patients.

To me, this is truly a quality that is worth mentioning because I don’t think what they do is easy at all. As patients we all are different. Some of us have it easy, but some of us are suffering … a lot, yet all of us at the center receive the same kindness, the same attention, and the same love. This love is a total and unconditional love given freely to the person in need. So yes, these ladies truly deserve the recognition for their practice of “living for the sake of others”, which is the only way to live if we sincerely want to create a meaningful and lasting peace.

Perfection is a moving target

Perfection is a moving target - June 16, 2002

• I am perfect when, as a newborn, I cry for attention and think only of myself.
• I am perfect when, at six years old, I write on the wall with my new crayons and run in a mud puddle with my new shoes.
• I am perfect when, at sixteen years old, I want to change the world, cry out for peace and freedom, and challenge the authorities.
• I am perfect when, at twenty-six years old, I seek for long-term companionship, look for stability in my new job, try to understand the world around me, and make efforts to belong.
• I am perfect when, at thirty-six years old, I volunteer as coach for the middle school girls softball team, I camp out with my son and his boy-scout group, I donate blood occasionally. When I try to be the best I can be, seeking God guidance every day. When I obey the good laws, and involve myself in trying to change what I feel are inadequate or bad laws.
• I am perfect when, at forty-six years old, I cry within my soul for the suffering of humankind, I have no hate in my heart for evil, but I hope that even It, someday will feel love and compassion.
• I am old today; I have no fear of death. I did my best and helped the world to be a better place. I thank God for His constant presence, His patience, and His love. I dream of a peaceful word and seek to help it from the world I am about to reach. I am perfect.

Anne-Marie Mylar 6/16/2002

PS: "I" does not mean “me, the author” it refers to any individual who is seeking to reach the ultimate embodiment of God’s nature.

Overcoming ancestral resentment

For those of you who believe of life after death, here is something to ponder about.

Today my daughter and I were discussing about people who through their irresponsible behavior kill other people, for example, drunk drivers, texting while driving, and so forth. I was telling my daughter that I had read about these individuals having a very hard time to live a normal life and some of them end up killing themselves because they cannot handle the burden of their guilt.

I asked my daughter what she thought would be the fastest way to overcome the resentment that the victims surely have. In addition, their families on earth and their ancestors in the spiritual world also must carry a tremendous resentment towards these individuals.

She suggested that perhaps they should die in a similar fashion than their victims. My answer to her was that even though their death in this fashion may remove some resentment, it would not solve the problem because now the ancestors of this individual may resent that death and start their own campaign of demanding restitution through yet another individual on earth who unwillingly committed that new crime. So, what should be the best solution?

Through my own understanding of the spiritual world , I believe that the best way to overcome once and for all the resentment created and liberate all these spirits that they may pursue their spiritual growth is for these individuals to actually live on earth as long as possible. They must find a way to live with their guilt and pay the indemnity necessary by living a very service oriented life. They must overcome any idea to justify their action; they must remain very humble, living a very unselfish and repentful life on earth. My understanding is that it is faster and easier to accomplish any kind of restitution while on earth. In the spiritual world, restoration process takes must longer since one will have to find someone on earth to work with.

Conscience

Recently I was trying to explain to my husband my understanding of "conscience" and where humankind stands in relationship to God and to Satan. God's kingdom is made of brilliant gold and white lights whereas Satan's kingdom is made of darkness. If one stands in the middle of the inner circle (see image at left) one has the opportunity to get a glimpse of both kingdoms, and the choices we make in our daily life will either bring us closer to one side or the other. Moreover, the closer we are to one side or the other side the more difficult it is to even see or perceive the other kingdom, and therefore the easier it is to keep going the path we have already started on.


Those who stand in the darkness cannot even understand the concept that there might be a different kingdom, and therefore the more difficult it is for them to make the effort to turn around and go a path they cannot see. On the other side away from the darkness, the closer we get to the light, the more difficult for us it becomes to reverse our path. Eventually we will come to a point where the darkness will not even be seen any longer, and therefore the path toward it will no longer exit. That point in the light will be the beginning of our perfection.

About Judgment

Many humans have done amazing great deeds of serving and sacrificing and giving for centuries, I am thinking especially of religious missionaries in Africa, Asia, and South America. It is amazing, when thinking about it, how many millions of dollars and lives have been invested in serving mankind and yet, it is not enough.

One should wonder if money is the answer. I would argue against it. I have deep respect and would certainly put anyone on a pedestal who serve and sacrifice their entire life for the sake of the unfortunate. But, it is also important to understand that, that alone will not save us from our ultimate inhalation. Why, simply because the fundamental reason of man’s misery is within his soul.

One of the mistakes that all humans make is the mistake of judgment. We pass judgment on others in the daily course of our day; we do it not just once but many a times, each and every day. We pass judgment about religious, business, and political behaviors of our peers simply because they think and act differently than I. This is one of the most fundamental mistakes of us, humans.

Case in point:
A young man from our church recently made the following comment about adoption. Why would a couple adopt only from another couple of the same church? There are so many children out there who need to be adopted. There are many ways to review and response to this question. One is obvious; it has a religious connection, which makes just plain sense. To me, the second part of the comment is a lot more important than the first part. He is passing judgment according to his way of thinking and that is where we always go wrong.

He is basically accusing other people of not adopting these hopeless children. Why, should judgment be passed? Be my guest, adopt children from where ever background you would like, I will not pass judgment, I will command you for your giving heart, and respect the way you found to help your fellow man. But, please, do not judge me for not doing so. My sacrifice, my ability to serve mankind is just different, not wrong, just different.

Religious people should know better, but we still fall into the pattern above and delay spiritual process every time we do so.

Another Case in point:
I have witness and read many vitriolic comments about the thoughts, behaviors, and decisions of the President of our country. I cannot argue any of the points because I am not politically savvy and do not pretend to understand all the issues at hand. However, from the standpoint of a religious person, I believe a different attitude would be more helpful. I hope that those of us who endlessly criticized and put down the leader of our country, do get on their knees every night and ask God to help, guide, and nurture this president of ours that he will make the correct decisions for the benefit of mankind according to God’s point of you.

We reap what we sow

We are all aware of this old saying. Most of us probably even believe it. Why then is it so difficult to pay attention to it. I watched today a YouTube video about a town meeting in Tampa. My sound was off. However, what I saw already told me that either side did not make any progress of making themselves understood. There was way too much anger and violent behavior to deserve any attention.

If one wants to be heard, listening is the first priority. If one wants understanding, then effort in comprehending a different point of view is a must. If one wants peace, then a peaceful attitude and mind is in order. There is no other way.

No matter how much ranting and raving one does about a particular point of view, the result is only a lot of noise and very little else. To be listened to, one must behave in a way that the listener will want to listen even if the listener has a different opinion. The listener must feel comfortable, he or she must not feel threatened. The listener must feel that his/her opinion is respected. If you can make the listener feel that he or she will learn something by listening, you have already won.

Leadership and Followership

Leadership is most of the time an in-born quality that still needs to be cultivated by the one person put in such a position. Very few people are actually born with that kind of quality. If we observe mankind’s behavior we will see that we are followers and very happy to be so. It take leadership qualities for a follower to stand and challenge the actions of a leader, few of us have that ability.

However, there is nothing wrong by being the follower. A follower will make or break a leader no matter who he or she is. The leader is dependent on the success of the followers, without them he or she is nothing. One ability to work under a mediocre leader and succeed in the accomplishment of the task at end is in God's eyes a successful person and deserves God’s blessings.

A follower who does not criticize, gives support and guidance when needed, is patient, is a gold mine to any leader.

We must remember that leaders are not born with the wisdom of old masters, they will make many mistakes, we have no right to judge as we are not in their shoes, our only right is to be the best support we can, following our conscience and the Principles we have learn.

If a leader does not fulfill his part of the bargain in a relationship it is not our responsibility but his or hers and it should not affect the way the follower should behave.

Definition of a True Woman

True Women

A true woman will have accomplished what she was created for. A true woman will have the feeling of fulfillment that will resonate throughout her being. A true woman will have experienced all feminine aspect of God’s love. A true woman will know she is not a man and will have no desire to ever compete with one or become one.

A true woman can give life. A true woman can nurture life. A true woman can look at her husband and sons in ecstasy and be proud of their worldly accomplishments without envy, their victories are her doing. A true woman will raise her daughters to become true woman.

In an ideal world, a true woman shall be found at all levels of society. She will not be found there because she victoriously overcame men’s rules. She will be found there because she was the best individual for the position she now holds.

Politician

In order to be eligible to become a politician one should go to school just like doctors, lawyers, and teachers do. At this so special college they would get serious character education and leadership training. One will learn all about the world multiple cultures inside and out. They will have internship in the poorest and the richest countries of the world. They will be graded not only for the knowledge of their mind but for the love and unselfishness of their heart.

Once these elite people graduate, they will have to prove themselves, first by small assignments like mayorship of a town, then they can be promoted to governorship of a state, and so on. After having proven themselves for at least 10 years in their ability to lead, would they qualify for the Presidency of the United States. They will be chosen not for the money that they can spend but we will look at their records from the time they started college until the present time and grade them accordingly.